January 31, 2005

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Filed under: Uncategorized — Rob @ 5:08 am

Oh interweb, how I love thee.

Today a friend sent me a hilarious webcam video featuring some estranged blonde teen in America. Over the course of 3 minutes she proceeds to proclaim her undying love (read: utter obsession) with someone known only as ‘Matt’, whilst stripping naked and showing him her “goods” - yes, “the whole package”. It would be erotic if it wasn’t impossible not to laugh. Pure fucking Shakespeare, but hide the knives.

I’m told it’s doing the rounds as “Psycho_Girl.wmv”, and that there is a further 4 minutes footage that my clip doesn’t have. Answers on a postcard.

January 29, 2005

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Filed under: Uncategorized — Rob @ 3:09 am

Cute, huh? At 3am, and indeed for several hours preceeding, cute suffices for endless entertainment. These webcams are little windows into other lives on the other side of the planet. Weird feeling.

To get in on the fun, simply type inurl:ViewerFrame?Mode= into Google and you’ll receive the urls to many thousands of unsecured cams all over the place. These are mostly security cams which aren’t meant to be public access, where you can zoom in on shop employees and customers, though some are quirky “here a nice view” cams like the rodents above.

Other favourites include this one, a view into the owners living room, where you can even turn off various lights. To much personal amusement, rapidly clicking OFF-ON-OFF-ON-OFF creates a strobe effect, and I managed to get the owner off his sofa to switch the cam off :)

Try it yourself! More later.

January 24, 2005

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Filed under: Uncategorized — Rob @ 3:38 am

Apparently this is a deviant, heinous crime, and I shall be hung, drawn and quartered for it. We live in hope.

Firstly, this. Secondly (and even more amusingly) this.

Suggest this bait should be taken up by many people, just because we can.

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Filed under: Uncategorized — Rob @ 1:34 am

At the risk of sounding like a one-track record, this is another ‘Warcraft post. Instead of being an entry, though, it’s some kind of rambling apologia for the lack of further World of Warcraft posts. I’ll excuse you if you pass on this post, or you could just skip straight to the summary at the bottom. I’ll try to make this as cogent as possible.

See, after burning the candle at both ends, you really get sick of blogging what is essentially a fake-narrative (for the screenshots) that always fails to do much justice to the game experience you’ve just had. This makes you depressed: you’re failing your audience, you’re tired (because, being an insane night-dweller it is now THE AM) and you’re sick of playing the game which parodically you actually really, really like. Being burnt out, tired and angsty like this is not good.

Maybe I’m wrong. You’re probably not as tired with WoW as I am, you might even be expecting another entry, so I’d better go some way to answering that desire.

Quite apart from not wanting to blog, after a few days of non-stop adventuring I literally had no desire to play the game any further. It’s a horrible feeling. I still loved it, but I’d overdosed entirely in one long pleasure-binge and I’d had enough. The drug analogy is not entirely off-key - two days later I created another character, a dwarf hunter, and played for five hours straight. The next day, the pet gimmick wore off and I got bored with it again. A few days ago I was back to it - an undead rogue, whom I spent three hours with. Then, boredom.

Today I kicked it with my original character Tik, now level 21, and certainly tough enough to take on big quests and get involved in PvP. The trouble is, I’m still hesitant to get to engrossed because the character will get reset along with everyone elses come retail, so it’s utterly futile to bother levelling or questing. A little annoying fact that’s always at the back of your mind. I look at people 40+ (of which I’ve seen about 5, all on horseback, which does look cool) and just think “HOW?! WHY?!” That also annoys me.

Summary: no more posts about World of Warcraft. I’m still playing it, but…bygones.

For what would have been the contents of the final post, click here. This is the best thing that I’ve experienced in any MMO, ever, and it’s why WoW is a cut above the rest. Some text to go along with it (shamelessly nicked from a forum post I made:

About an hour ago, around 300 Alliance members formed in Stormwind, and marched across the lands to do battle with the Horde scum in their own neighbourhood. There were numerous raiding parties, each holding around 60 warriors. I joined ranks with the troops lead by Dafox, and we took the Deep Run Tram to the icy regions of Ironforge, the dwarven capital. After that we trekked along many roads, across the Arathi highlands to the Hillsbrad foothills, where we would meet our foe.

After forming with all the parties on the docks of Southshore, we trooped back along the roads and engaged our targets. Then, some foolish members of our party attacked the Tauren Mill, which led to a hasty retreat under the attack of hundreds of angry guards*. Shortly after we recooperated, some Horde forces sought us out amongst the trees, and more followed. We crushed them all unsparringly. After around 20 minutes of fighting, the Horde finally managed to summon enough troops to repel us from their territory. We retreated, and fled for safety, victorious in the majority of battles.

* which was utterly hilarious for anyone standing at a safe distance taking pictures.

January 16, 2005

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Filed under: Uncategorized — Rob @ 8:39 pm

World of Warcraft Final Beta Diary

The story continues…

After a brief journey to and from Stormwind castle by way of the Gryphon service [1], and while spent adventuring in Westfall, it was off to Ellywn for some recooperation in the Inn. This idea soon took a decidedly bad turn when the Horde turned up looking for fresh meat. I was travelling to Stormwind, a minutes walk from Goldshire, when I saw a lone Orc sitting with his back to me on the road. In an instance he span around, and started towards me. I ran back to the relative safety of the inn (for he was far more powerful than me) and called for support over the local defense [2]. Shortly after that the report rang out of the World defense channel, and soon a large number of Alliance fighters turned up to see off the invaders!

During the evening I joined a few friends on the beaches of Westfall to hunt for Murlocs [3]. We needed their eyes for a tasty stew. Pictured is Geddon’s boar taking the brunt of attacks, whilst I languidly heal from a distance. Ah, tis a hard life. When my friends left, I made preparations to leave Westfall, and met with Frej. We had an impromptu dance session on the hill with Tweet and his magic flute [4], before flying to Stormwind and taking the tram to Ironforge, the Dwarven capital [5]. I secured a beefy new mace in a busy auction [6] (for a bargain price), and then we left for the mountains. The last three pictures capture something of the untouched beauty of the Ice Flow lake. Eerily silent bar the lapping of the water against the bank, and the odd wolf howl in the distance, a fishing trip to end a hectic day!

More soon.

January 13, 2005

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Filed under: Uncategorized — Rob @ 3:22 pm

World of Warcraft Final Beta Diary
I am a complete and utter numpty. I edited *this* post to create the next diary installment, and forgot to save it as a new post entirely. Hence overwriting happened. Hence much anguish and head slapping. Apologies for the complete lack of word magic in this post, therefore, as I try to remember what I already wrote. Cho!

Summing up videogames for beginners: “the best MMO I’ve ever played”. A line often seen slapped pull-quote style onto promo artwork, only this time, for me, it actually rings true. I’ve played a whole load of MMOs, but never has one managed to cripple my social life so severely as World of Warcraft. In other words, it’s so engrossing that it eats, nay, gorges its way through fatty, calorific life-hours, and resistance is blissfully futile.

Before the eye-candy, a brief explanation of why it rocks so hard (and I do mean brief - I could wax lyrical, but I want to get back to playing the damn thing). Firstly Blizzard’s rendering of a sizeable Tolkien-esque landmass is faultless. Not once has anything broken my zen-like immersion into this virtual world; that’s not to say that everything is credible in a real-world sense, just that in terms of being a Warcraft game, it utterly works. Stupid kobolds line the paths of the Fargodeep mine, ready to receive a bashing from low-level adventurers. But the quest isn’t “go here and kill X kobolds” (although those do come later, and are just as fun), it’s “danger is abroad across the land of Ellwyn, yadda yadda, we need you to find out just how deep the rot lies” except written by someone of credible dialogue-writing talent.

There is a presient story beneath every quest - namely that the once beautiful lands of the Alliance are tainted with unspeakable evil beings, and so on and so forth. And on the other side - which I have yet to play - the verbose anti-human(oid) propaganda is likely just as believable. The Taurens, for example, love the natural landscape which has become destroyed by the those pesky man-beasts. Etcetera.

It’s been a long time coming, and certainly the EU release has benefited from the troubles of the already-available (much to the chagrin of WoW fans this side of the pond) US version - notably there is very little game-halting latency, and few bugs that actually impede progress. But even without mentioning the robust PvP system, or the talents and professions, or the classes, it reads as great videogaming - and I can assure you it plays like that too. I’ll discuss more features over entries to come.

My diary of the past few days, in picture form:

The story begins…

I am Tik, human Paladin and servant of the Light. Human recruits in Azeroth find themselves in the fort-cum-monastry of Northshire, but the first construction that truly impresses is the white city of Stormwind [1]. Not hard to feel a little insignificant at first, but soon it becomes a genuine home. The inns are often very busy at night. The first few days I spent on brief quests across the counties of Ellwyn and Westfall. Note a very worried Tik standing in a gloomy pumpkin patch at 1am [2], or the darkened mine of Fargodeep [3] (the realtime day/night cycle in WoW is impressive. The server runs at GMT +1, and every player experiences the same time unless they otherwise mod the UI).

Later that morning I hooked up with a feisty Rogue called Frej, and we took on a number of quests, including clearing a forest of wolves and bears so that we could collect wood for the local village [4]. Death is not entirely unpleasant [5]. Certainly the first time it’s a dire shock, as the sky turns to a eternal half-light and the cold winds sweep across your body, but later it becomes something that you just accept - another tale to be recounted wryly to friends, over several beers at the inn. Isn’t it pretty?

The last four shots recount experiences in the Westfall area - a barren shire overrun with beasts and bandits. Isn’t it pretty?

More soon.

January 6, 2005

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Filed under: Uncategorized — Rob @ 5:14 am

Lazy and cynical as I am, the start of a new calendar year inspired me to make one single resolution: to do more stuff and do it more often.

In some instances this is gleefully self-fulfilling: I aim to play more videogames, for example. I use the full term here because I find that saying ‘games’ makes me seem less adventurous even to those who also love the damn things as much as me. First on the list is World of Warcraft, which looks excrutiatingly brilliant from what I’ve seen. The European final beta starts very soon, and if I don’t get in on that I shall beat someone repeatedly before pre-ordering from Amazon.

Some other stuff I aim to do more of include writing stuff for this ’site’ (which has somewhat removed the need or desire to build a fully-functioning .com; laziness again, I fear) and listen to more music. This stuff is easy. Now the hard: watch more films. Sure, it’s not exactly torture - I am going to study Film in September, and I’m utterly obsessed as you may have gathered. From a simple logistics point of view, though, it’s hard to cram in more film-hours than I have done in 2004. Short of a total count-up (which, inevitably, I will do at some point soon) I estimate I saw over 250 films, which forms a mighty hurdle to overcome. Hey ho, someone has to do it.

Hmm, random interjection time.

I’m currently reading (right this minute) Tom Francis’ weblog. Tom Francis is a games journalist, and currently writes for PC Gamer UK. He is ofen hilarious. Actually, it’s his blog (or pseudo-blog) that spurned me to write this, because I felt ashamed of not writing anything new. Hrm. Anyway, here is a link that I just followed from his latest entry. A bizarre Peanuts-esque web comic that made me laugh lots. And cripes it’s ten-to-six, I must away.

January 1, 2005

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Filed under: Uncategorized — Rob @ 5:34 am

Heh. Au revoir 2004.